Two...Not So Terrible After All

Two year-olds are great, aren't they? No, I'm serious. Yes, they are a bit feisty and independent, but it is also wonderful to see their determination to keep up with everyone and master different skills. In my (very limited) experience, I have found that the more you embrace this stage and try to see things from their perspective, the better things seem to go.

Case in point.

This child is adorable. And sometimes a little (or a lot) demanding. Loves to snuggle, loves the color pink. Hates when you try to buckle her car seat. Or help her get dressed. Or help her do anything...unless she first realizes she can't actually do it herself and then asks you for help. So most of the time, I just let her try first and wait until she figures out she can't do something before I help. She surprises me often though and is actually capable of doing things I might have tried to do for her.

Discussing two year-olds would be incomplete if we didn't also mention tantrums. Don't you just love a legs-flailing, arm-flapping, high-pitched tantrum executed properly by a two year-old? Highly entertaining. With Braden, tantrums used to be very frustrating for me. He wasn't much of a tantrum-thrower but when he did throw one, IT threw ME. There is something about your protesting child lying flat on their back in the middle of the grocery store refusing to move that makes you want to rip your hair out. Agreed?

Now that I've had some more experience with parenting, I don't mind tantrums so much. I've realized that most tantrums occur because kids either feel out of control (because everyone is telling them what to do) or because they have a very strong emotion (frustration, anger, etc) and they don't know what to do with it. That said, I generally take one of two approaches. I either pretend not to notice it or help them try to figure out what they can do instead. Keri is much more dramatic than Braden and thus is more prone to dramatic behavior :) So you will often hear me saying (as I carry her convulsing, flailing body to her room), "Keri, it looks like you need some time to calm down. I'm going to let you calm down in your room until you feel ready to _____." I had to practice for awhile until I could say it in a non-sarcastic, calm voice. But already, she often tells me halfway up the stairs, "I'm ready to talk. I play nice."

Anyway, the only thing that has been much harder the second time around with a two year-old is that she desperately wants to keep up with her older brother and do everything he does. And she is such a determined little girl that she can now do a lot of the things he didn't master until he was older, like getting dressed or being potty trained. But sometimes, she just can't do what he does and I can see the frustration on her face. It really is hard to be two, I think. Your body just can't do what your mind wants to.

Well, different people like different parts of parenting better. Some people hate the toddler stage. Some people hate the teenage years. Some people like all of it. The good news is that if you are having trouble with a particular age, it will most definitely pass before long. I find each different phase has its challenges, but for the most part I am trying to just enjoy it all because I know that one day, when it's all over, I will miss it.

Anyway, I love The Two Year-Old. I like the challenge of trying to help her become independent and I like seeing her learn new things and develop patience.

Now that I just wrote that "I love The Two-Year-Old", it's kind of ironic that she just walked up to me wearing her shirt inside-out and her shorts backwards to inform me that there is "milk on da floor." Gotta love 'em, right?!